Yesterday Came and Went . . . Like an Ordinary Day – Robberies and Murder Thirty-One Years Later

Yesterday came and went . . . like an ordinary day.

I never thought it would happen. But, it has finally come to that. A place of peace, of healing, of forgiveness, and compassion.

It has taken thirty-one years. Thirty-one hard-fought, terror-filled, tearful, soul-searching, prayerful, journal-filling, therapy-seeking years on this healing journey. A path filled with lessons from healthy processing to coping skills to forgiveness techniques to self-compassion.

I tell my podcast guests and audience that my two most profound lessons learned throughout these years have been:

1) Be gentle with yourself.

2) Just notice.

I used to be so damn hard on me. Get over it, Teri. Stop living in the past, Teri. Let it go, for God’s sake. Then I learned about ACEs (adverse childhood experiences) and C-PTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder) and the impact of trauma on our brain, body and spirit. THAT is when I started to be gentle with myself and true healing began.

By learning to “just notice” (without judgment of whatever was surfacing), I learned to become comfortable in my own body. I then began to understand triggers (both benign and real) and my brain and body’s response to those triggers. Another much needed tool to helping me heal.

These two bank robberies – a mere ninety-three days apart – were a gift in that they brought me out of my trauma-coma. I had stuffed my childhood into little boxes, stored in the back of a scary closet in a cold dark basement. The sexual molestations, the date-rape, the physical abuse, living with the emotional abandonment of an addict, the bullying . . . all of it waiting for that final straw. This second robbery was that straw.

The gift from all of this? I have learned to appreciate life. Every little ladybug. Every giggle heard across a restaurant after falling from a child’s carefree little self. Every magnificent sunset. Every heart I find whether it’s bird poop or a wildflower bouquet. Every moment with my mom trying to be patient in her battles with her own demons. Every evening spent laughing with friends. Every phone call in which I hear one of my children’s voices. Every hug. Every podcast interview with beautiful healing souls. Every sign from God.

What a gift that I lived to share the story of hope and healing.

The Healing Place Podcast: Janyne McConnaughey – Brave

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I am your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunesBlubrrySpotify, or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/. You can also watch our insightful interview on YouTube.

I loved connecting with Janyne McConnaughey to discuss being brave, childhood trauma, dissociative coping mechanisms, healing strategies, EMDR therapy, and so much more! Thank you, Janyne, for joining me on the podcast and shining your beautiful light of hope into the world.

Bio:

“Janyne McConnaughey, Ph.D., retired from a forty-year career in education while healing from the attachment wounding and trauma she experienced as a child. During therapy, she wrote her way to healing and now is redeeming her story by helping others to understand the lifelong effects of childhood trauma and insecure attachment.

Janyne is a frequent guest blogger for the Attachment and Trauma Network, blogs at her own website (Janyne.org), and other organizations addressing trauma and attachment. She accepts a limited number of speaking engagements and can be contacted through her website.

Along with Brave: A Personal Story of Healing Childhood Trauma, and the companion book, Jeannie’s Brave Childhood: Behavior and Healing through the Lens of Attachment and Trauma, Janyne is working to complete three other books in the BRAVE series. She enjoys living in and exploring the Seattle area with her husband, Scott, children, and grandchildren. Her favorite activity is to follow her GPS to “green spaces” along the coast of Puget Sound.

To Find Janyne online, visit:

Website: http://Janyne.org

Twitter: @janynetweets

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/janynemc/Janyne McConnaughey, Ph.D.Puyallup, WAjamcconnaughey@gmail.comhttps://www.janyne.org/

BRAVE: A Personal Story of Healing Childhood TraumaJeannie’s BRAVE Childhood: Behavior and Healing through the Lens of Attachment and Trauma 

https://cladach.com/brave/ Local Author: https://ppld.org/local-authors/mcconnaughey-janyne

Find out more about Janyne’s mission at https://www.janyne.org/.

Peace to you all!
Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: 
https://mailchi.mp/741bdf08d718/hope-for-healing-newsletter-may-2019

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

The Healing Place Podcast: David J. Kenney – Kid Epics

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I am your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunesBlubrrySpotify, or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/. You can also watch our insightful interview on YouTube.

David Kenney shares his insights on adopting traumatized children, the impact of ACEs (adverse childhood experiences), healing avenues, trauma recovery, and much more during our in-depth conversation. Thank you, David, for joining me on-air and helping others along their healing journey.

Bio:

“David J. Kenney is a seasoned speaker having presented to parent and professional groups at colleges, universities and educational in-services on topics such as healing trauma, stress management, anxiety reduction, helping children with attention deficits, behavior as a language, general parenting and achieving success in our schools.

David has been a school psychologist for over twenty-eight years in a diverse group of educational settings, from rich to poor, from one of the highest ranked schools in the state to one with much less success. He has worked in urban, suburban and rural settings. He currently teaches psychology courses at Lansing Community College.

As an undergraduate student, David was invited to the 1985 National Fairweather conference to present a program he developed using creative writing with chronic, schizophrenic patients. This project was spotlighted in the Detroit Free Press on August 30, 1985. In 1986, David graduated, magna cum laude, from the University of Detroit with a Bachelor’s degree in psychology and again as a Specialist in School Psychology in 1989. He was liaison to the Michigan State Board of Education from 1995 to 1997 and served as President of the Michigan Association of School Psychologists in 1997-98.

But all achievements pale when compared to raising traumatized children to a healthy maturity. Children wounded by the world have been given little reason to trust it, so there were no guarantees of successful outcomes. Through his committed efforts, Dave and Barb learned strategies to heal harmed children. His expertise and insight has been noted by colleagues, who continue to seek him out for mentoring and training.”

Find out more about David’s mission at https://www.kid-epics.com/

Peace to you all!
Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/9813e51db66b/hope-for-healing-newsletter-december-2018

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

Therapy Dog Thank You: Sammie Brings Joy to Schools

Every Tuesday morning this school year, Sammie and I have visited the kids at Terrace Park Elementary school. Sammie melts my heart as I witness her work her therapy dog magic with these sweet little humans. The idea of helping a child who is experiencing anxiety or feelings of overwhelm touches me on a soul level. I know how much small gestures of kindness and gentle acceptance meant to me as a child. That’s what helped me live through my hell and come out smiling. Sammie is helping me pay it forward with her gentle ways with kids.

Today these kids and the amazing staff at that school made my heart smile . . . and Sammie’s tail wag. A lot!! They gifted us with a new backpack (mine was falling apart and my menopause brain kept forgetting to switch over to another backpack!), bags of dog treats, much needed Dentastix (Sammie has stinky dog breath even though I brush her teeth), toys for Sam, even toys for our puppy Max . . . and noodles!!!

But, the cards. These hand-written thank yous teared me up and, again, had my heart smiling. To know my beautiful dog touches so many lives just by radiating love and giving stinky kisses and sharing hugs (she has started to put her head on a shoulder and push her head against the hugger’s head) . . . is fulfilling in ways I can’t really express in words. It’s like my soul is filled with light.

So I send out a thank you to the awesome staff who welcome us each week with smiles and dog treats in the office before we head upstairs, thank you to the amazing teachers who invite us into their classrooms, thank you to Tricia and Liz for helping me continue to learn the gifts contained in just listening and for offering Sammie a space to shine, thank you Jen Hrovat for introducing us all and giving an adorable hint on the rainbow tennis balls. And THANK YOU to the kids for loving my Sammie girl and brightening our Tuesday mornings.

I love this dog. She’s a therapy dog. She’s The Doodle with the Noodle. She’s sweet. And snuggly. And funny. And overflowing with love. She’s my best friend. And my snuggle buddy. My hiking pal. And my calming presence.

But most of all, she is love. A lot of love in a furry body.

The Healing Place Podcast: Donna Jenson – Time to Tell

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I am your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunesBlubrrySpotify, or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/. You can also watch our insightful interview on YouTube.

Laughter is a healing tool and we shared the gift of laughter during this deep conversation on a difficult subject. Thank you, Donna, for helping others along their healing journey by sharing your powerful story, your beautiful gift of writing, your talents and truths.

Bio:

“Founder and Director of Time To Tell – with a mission to spark stories from lives affected by incest and sexual abuse to be told and heard. She wrote and performs her one-woman play, What She Knows: One Woman’s Way Through Incest to Joy, which is based on her own experience of surviving incest, at conferences and in communities. She leads writing workshops for survivors interested in finding their voice and using it. Her book, Healing My Life from Incest to Joy, is a memoir of the choices she made and experiences she had that helped her heal from her childhood trauma. ”

Find out more about Donna’s mission at https://www.timetotell.org/ .

Peace to you all!
Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/9813e51db66b/hope-for-healing-newsletter-december-2018

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

The Healing Place Podcast: Maria Dunlap – Vivian’s Victory

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I am your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry, Spotify, or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/. You can also watch our insightful interview on YouTube.

What a beautiful conversation with Maria Dunlap, founder and CEO of Vivian’s Victory, about the difficult subject of losing a child and parenting a child with a chronic illness along with a discussion on the gifts that come from grief and the healing journey. Thank you, Maria, for sharing your heartache, triumph, and light of hope with those needing support and guidance.

Bio:

“Maria Dunlap is the Founder and CEO of Vivian’s Victory. Vivian’s Victory is a nonprofit dedicated to bring hope, building community and bridging gaps for families that have a child diagnosed with a chronic illness. After Maria’s daughter, Vivian, died in the hospital at 59 days old in 2012, she knew families needed to receive support during perhaps the hardest moments of their lives. Since the inception of Vivian’s Victory in 2014, over 2,000 families have been impacted through their mission.”

Find out more about Maria’s mission at https://viviansvictory.org/.

Peace to you all!
Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/9813e51db66b/hope-for-healing-newsletter-december-2018

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

The Healing Place Podcast: Amit Janco – (Un)Bound Together

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I am your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry, Spotify, or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/. You can also watch our insightful interview on YouTube.

I so enjoyed this amazing conversation with Amit Janco (I found it fascinating to be talking to someone on the other side of the world who was already in tomorrow!), discussing her personal continued healing journey after falling from a bridge, the exciting release of her book (Un)Bound Together: A Journey to the End of the Earth (and Beyond), the healing aspects of nature and art, and so much more. Thank you, Amit, for sharing your brilliant insights (I love your ability to paint a picture with your words) and shining the light of hope.

Bio:

“Amit Janco is a writer, serial walker, labyrinth designer and yogi who has lived in Bali since 2011. As an artist, Young Living oiler and Narrative Therapy practitioner, she loves to design multi-sensory experiences that inspire creative expression. After falling from a bridge in early 2009, Amitset off, like thousands before her, on a journey of physical healing along the mythical Camino de Santiago. What was slated to be little more than a rehabilitative adventure of walking across the undulating terrain of northern Spain, would become an unexpectedly gratifying, comical, and, at times, emotionally tumultuous odyssey through physical and emotional recovery, into the very heart and soul of her existence. Part memoir and part Camino pilgrimage, Amit’s newly-released book, (Un)Bound, Together: A Journey to the End of the Earth (and Beyond), reveals how a quest for whole healing can unfold in unlikely ways and places.”

Amit Janco


Find out more about Amit’s inspirational work at https://amitjanco.com/ and follow her on her blog at https://healingpilgrim.com/.

Peace to you all!
Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/9813e51db66b/hope-for-healing-newsletter-december-2018

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

Coping Strategy: Write an Unconditional Love Prayer

I want to share one coping strategy a month. These are strategies I use (or have used) in my own life as I travel the healing journey. I hope they bring you tranquility, as well!


 WRITE AN UNCONDITIONAL LOVE PRAYER


Write an unconditional love prayer for one person who has created difficulty in your life. Think only of their needs, pain, and heartache. Do not mention your own. This is about honoring that person’s journey and offering unconditional love in the form of prayer.

I did this in relation to someone I had considered my best friend for almost seven years before she *ghosted me. It was liberating. This prayer helped me to let go.

*Ghosting: the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.