Defining Resilience Series: Step 8 – Be Gentle with Ourselves

Defining Resilience

Step 8: Be Gentle with Ourselves

Before diving into step 8, a reminder about resilience: it is defined as the ability to overcome adverse conditions; with healthy bonding relationships, guidance, support, and compassion as the catalysts. Basically, it entails having the capacity to bounce back from stressful or overwhelming experiences. 

What are some steps we can take to ensure we are building resilience in our lives?

  1. Focus on the positives. 
  2. Seek out and nurture supportive relationships.
  3. Utilize self-care strategies. 
  4. Take action steps to create positive change.
  5. Work on healthy habit formation. 
  6. Find a guiding hand to hold.
  7. Learn to become our own hero. 
  8. Be gentle with ourselves.

Today we will cover Step 8: Be gentle with ourselves.

I had two moments when I first transitioned onto a healing path that stand out as life-altering. My therapist at the time had mentioned to me, “Just notice” during one of our sessions, in the midst of a pretty intense flashback when panic attack symptoms were overwhelming me. Allowing myself the opportunity to just notice those sensations without judgment created an incredible shift in their power over me.

The other shift-inducing incident involved a friend suggesting to me, “Be gentle with yourself, T.” It was one of those smack-to-the-head moments. Be gentle with myself? What the heck does THAT mean? How do I even do that? I realized in that brief exchange that I had been so incredibly hard on myself about my trauma history and attempts at recovery. 

I want to share with you a few of the steps I took to learn a more patient and loving approach with myself:

  • Forgive yourself: If you are holding onto any blame, shame, guilt, or a burden of responsibility for anything that happened to you . . . give yourself the gift of forgiveness. Write yourself a love letter releasing you from that weight. For decades, I carried a self-blame banner when it came to certain incidents in my life. If I hadn’t been drinking so much then I wouldn’t have put myself in that vulnerable position to be taken advantage of by a man. If I had just told my parents what was happening. If I hadn’t been so needy. I stopped all of that blame and shame talk. Remind yourself that you were not to blame. Know this on a soul level. And forgive yourself for burdening you with that heavy load. You are so very worthy of the resulting peace.  
  • Practice being gentle with yourself: I started to utilize the idea of being gentle with myself throughout my day. If I noticed any negative self-talk, such as, Why can’t you just get over this, I would remind myself, Something is surfacing, Teri. Just notice is. What is being triggered? I then would meditate or journal about it, but continuing to not judge any of it. Just gentle observation.                               
  • Give yourself the gift of self-love: Sounds simple enough, but, wow, can this be tough. Especially for those of us who experienced adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). Practice positive affirmations by repeating mantras such as, “I am calm. I am beautiful. I am peace. I am loved.” The gift of time is a precious self-love commodity, too. Allow time to pursue your passions – whether that’s a stroll in nature, absorbing the beauty, or creating art or taking a new yoga class.   
  • Be patient: As you continue traveling along this healing journey, there are days when you’ll be baby-stepping along oh-so-carefully, other days where you will be leaping into new discoveries, and others when you turn around and retreat. That’s okay. Again, this is a journey, an exploration into sometimes scary territory. Gently remind yourself you’ve got this. Continue to ask, every day, What is the lesson I am learning with this? You are allowed the opportunity to learn in those set-back moments. 
  • Reward yourself: I recently visited a classroom with my registered therapy dog, Sammie. We met with forty-two 4th grade kiddos. One of the questions asked during our Q&A session was, “How did you train Sammie?” I took this opportunity to discuss positive reinforcement. Sammie learned her needed therapy dog skills through classroom instruction along with positive reinforcement outside the classroom. Lots of “good girl, Sam!” and treats. The same goes for us as we learn to live a life free from trauma burdens. A “Way to go!” or “You got this!” goes a long way toward building our confidence.

Coming up next month: New series – Positivities of Persistence 

Excerpt from my upcoming Hope for Healing Newsletter – February 2019. Find previous versions and subscribe to future editions: https://mailchi.mp/293195d4a027/hope-for-healing-newsletter-january-2019

Receiving a Rock for Christmas: ACEs Parenting 101


“Mom, Your life and work are so inspiring. Your social media presence is a light for people on a day to day basis. Your podcasts are influencing in all the right ways. Your writings are beautiful works of love that all need to hear. Keep up all your hard work and the dividends will exponentially grow. Remember that love is everywhere and I will always support you, even from across the country from atop mountains. Love, John” 

John Wellbrock – letter to mom, Teri Wellbrock, Christmas 2018

I have been collecting hearts for a few years now. My friends will send me photos of hearts they find. I will post pics on social media of my heart finds. I even recently wrote an e-book, Stop Thinking . . . Just Love, filled with over six hundred heart photos. I have a collection of hearts on their own page on my website. And in my sacred writing space, I have a collection of special hearts given to me by loved ones, friends, and therapists.

Christmas 2018 I added a special Rocky Mountains heart to my treasure. My oldest son, John, my kindred spirit, my boy with a physicist’s mind and a poet’s heart, gave me the gift of a rock for Christmas.

Yep. A rock.

Plus, a letter. Written from his heart.

I have sometimes questioned my parenting skills. Am I doing this right? Did I coddle them too much, trying to compensate for my own painful childhood, filled with moments of terror and abandonment? Did I do too much for them? Overprotect them to a fault? Should I have let them fall and stumble more often? I wanted them safe. I wanted them to feel loved and protected and treasured. I wanted them to know they were wanted and their opinions mattered.

Or I’d ridicule myself for not being strong enough to fight for them. For emotionally abandoning them when I was lost and hurting. Those endless years I’d spent holed up in a dark room, smoking cigarettes, playing mindless computer games or seeking solace from strangers in AOL chat rooms, shooing my children away.

Learning to forgive myself, forgive my parents, and forgive my transgressors, altered my life. It’s not for everyone. But, that’s what worked for me. That’s my message to the world. Take it or leave it.

I reminded a friend the other day that no matter what decisions we make regarding our children, if we do so with love as our driving force, with intentions filled with hopeful promise, then, yes, we are doing it right.

Years ago, I told my children I was so very sorry for anything I had done to hurt them. I explained that none of it was ever done in malice. I accepted responsibility for my actions in hurting them. And they graciously offered the beautiful gift of forgiveness to me.

Yesterday, on Christmas morning, 2018, as my tears flowed, and I threw my arms around my now twenty-five-year-old baby boy, I knew in my heart . . . I did it right.

And as I kissed my eighty-three-year-old mother good-bye, as she left our home, my heart overflowing with joy at her having made it through our first family Christmas celebration EVER without drinking alcohol, I realized that she did it right, too.

She had abandoned me emotionally as a child while lost in her own pain and her self-medicating through Valium and booze. She had summoned my father to hit me when she wanted silence. Yet, I know on a soul level, she loved me. And some how, some way, that love permeated.

So here we are. Healing a once-festering wound. Enjoying our new normal, a relationship filled with phone calls and shopping and laughter and movie dates. Mother-daughter endeavors I had only dreamed of having and had envied in others.

I now realize my mom needed to heal her own pain. Did she hurt me in her flailing? Absolutely. Am I saying it was acceptable? Absolutely not. What I am saying is that parenting is a struggle . . . especially when we have lived adverse childhood experiences ourselves and are still working through our own healing process. Yet, love prevails. It really does.

Some may disagree with me. That’s fine. But, I like to look at the positives and focus on the hope. The hope of healing. The hope that permeates forgiveness. The hope that is love.

So, yes, here we are. Loving our children, my mom and me. We did it in our own ways. But, we did it right.

#nevergiveup

Defining Resilience Series: Step 7 – Learn to Become Our Own Hero

Defining Resilience


Step 7: Learn to Become Our Own Hero

Before diving into step 7, a reminder about resilience: it is defined as the ability to overcome adverse conditions; with healthy bonding relationships, guidance, support, and compassion as the catalysts. Basically, it entails having the capacity to bounce back from stressful or overwhelming experiences. 

What are some steps we can take to ensure we are building resilience in our lives?

  1. Focus on the positives. 
  2. Seek out and nurture supportive relationships.
  3. Utilize self-care strategies. 
  4. Take action steps to create positive change.
  5. Work on healthy habit formation. 
  6. Find a guiding hand to hold.
  7. Learn to become our own hero. 
  8. Be gentle with ourselves.

Today we will cover Step 7: Learn to become our own hero.

One of those ah-ha moments in my life came when I realized that it was not up to anyone else to “save” me. Instead, I started to look to myself for empowerment. I experienced what I call “a shift” in 2013. Think of it as a change in philosophy, a willingness to open myself up to healing and answers. I allowed myself the gift of becoming my own hero. We all have the capacity for becoming our own superhero; we just need to open our hearts, minds, and souls to the possibility.

So, how did I learn to become my own hero? A whole helluva lot of research . . . along with some trial and error. The sole purpose of my Unicorn Shadows: From Trauma to Triumph – A Healing Guide book that I am finishing up the manuscript on is to guide others through the research I completed and allow readers an opportunity to engage in the steps I utilized. 

I will give you a head start here and offer five suggestions for starting your superhero work (go ahead and put that cape on!):

  • Build your knowledge by reading, watching, listening, and absorbing all you can about healthy self-care strategies: I have a resource library full of books I have read (filled with mark-ups for ideas that spoke to my soul). I will be adding those titles to my website some time over the next few months. I’ll be sure to send you an access code once I do so you can dive into those books and articles. I also have a bookmark folder on my web browser filled with articles and websites that provide healing guidance. I would list them all, but what speaks to MY soul might not speak to YOURS. Therefore, I recommend you search for self-help topics that pique your interest. Do searches on your local library site (did you know you can check out books online, too?), Amazon, YouTube, Vimeo, web browsers, by key words, Pinterest, Facebook – the options are endless. 
  • Be open to crazy awesome options for healing: When I started opening my mind up to new possibilities for healing my trauma wounds and relieving the resulting symptoms, miracles started to happen. No, seriously. For real. I started practicing exercises such as Ho’oponopono Hawaiian healing technique, the Ah Meditation, energy healing, and so much more. Next on my list is goat yoga! Watch my beautiful podcast interview with Belinda Farrell of Huna Healing for more information on Ho’oponopono. 
  • Choose one and try it: This seems pretty self-evident, but how many times have we made grandiose plans, done the research, but then stopped right there. It’s scary sometimes to try something new. Right? But, the best way to learn if something will help you feel more empowered is to simply DO it. Give it a whirl. Maybe a few whirls. If it works . . . yay! You can add that patch to your superhero cape. If not, see the next suggestion.
  • If it does not work, file it away, see it as a learning lesson, and move on to the next idea: This can be tough, too. We feel like we are giving up. Or maybe questioning, “Why does this work for other people, but not me?” Please know that we are all different with an eclectic mix of backgrounds. What works for one person might not work for us because of genetics or experiences (such as adverse childhood experiences or ACEs) or a combination of factors. Regardless, it’s okay. Put it in the “life lesson” file folder and move on to another superhero adventure. 
  • Build your superhero portfolio to use as needed: Once you have established a collection of tools . . . think of Batman’s utility belt . . . you will feel more empowered just by having more choices from which to turn to for your self-care strategies. But, keep on adding options as you grow stronger. Get yourself ready for your superhero strut. Watch out, world. Another bad-ass trauma-warrior is in the making.

Coming up next month: Step 8: Be gentle with ourselves.

*Excerpt from my upcoming Hope for Healing Newsletter . . . I would love to welcome you onto the Hope for Healing team! Join me here!

The Healing Place Podcast Episode 50: Mary Giuliani

Mary Giuliani

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I’m your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com.  You can also view our interview on YouTube!

I was excited to have Mary Giuliani join me for an inspirational conversation.

For the past 25 years, Master Life Coach, Transformational Talk Show Host, Speaker, and Singer & Songwriter, Mary Giuliani has dedicated her personal and professional life to inspiring and empowering her audience to listen to their hearts and be true to themselves so they can create lives they truly love.

Mary, like many people, had a difficult childhood due to being raised in a dysfunctional family that was fueled alcohol abuse, anger and chronic tension between her parents. She coped by soothing herself with food. She went on to struggle with food, weight and hating her body for over 40 years reaching a top weight of 310lbs. Fortunately after many decades of personal growth, she finally discovered the root cause of her problem…childhood trauma. Due to her dedication to healing on a psychological, physical, brain and relational level, Mary has been able to maintain a 160lb weight loss for the past 16 years.

She now shares her healing and transformational journey through coaching women who have also had a difficult childhood and who are currently struggling with food, weight and body issues, that in order to heal, they must address the root cause that is driving their need to use food, childhood trauma.

Mary also shares her story of healing, recovery and transformation through her talk show, Mary Giuliani LIVE, through public speaking and through her original songs.

To work with Mary as a coach, book her as a speaker at your next event, watch her transformational talk show, or listen to her original songs visit her website: www.MaryGiuliani.net.

Peace to you all!

Teri

Hope for Healing Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/6d83db4cf426/hope-for-healing-newsletter-november-2018

Book Launch Team: https://www.facebook.com/groups/unicornshadows/

What Is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)?


What is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)?
A friend of mine is a therapist, working with adults/teens in the Greater Cincinnati area, and one of her specialties in DBT or dialectical behavior therapy. I decided an interview with her would be a great addition to this newsletter. Thank you, Lauren O’Keefe, MS, for sharing your brilliant DBT insights with us.

1) What exactly is DBT?

This is such a common question! My immediate thought, “Um, DBT is DBT, what do you mean!” But, in all seriousness, it refers to “Dialectical Behavioral Therapy.” It is a life changing treatment modality pioneered by the fantastic Marsha Linehan.

DBT focuses on high sensitivity and high reactivity to triggers. It focuses and can address so many things.The main focus is to target parasuicidal and suicidal behaviors. It’s also one of the only effective and research-based treatments for borderline personality disorder and eating disorders. It assists with allowing opposite and dialectical functioning to be true. For an example: “You can be scared AND strong.” Or, “ You can be trying your best AND still need to do better.” DBT is all about acceptance, peace and non judgment.

DBT is effective when the treatment as a whole is being followed. This treatment includes group therapy, individual therapy and phone coaching components.

2) Are therapists all trained in it or is it a specialized modality?

Like most modalities, you can do either. In order to specialize, you must demonstrate proficiency. This includes but not limited to: frequent trainings, research, frequent practice of the skills, etc.

If you decide to certify rather than specialize, the certification process is extensive for this modality. It is one personally I am preparing for. I currently identify as highly specialized, with over 2 years of DBT use and experience.

To certify you must complete all 4-5 separate trainings that are each 1-2 day trainings. You must read the CBT for Borderline Personality Book, and lead a year of DBT groups. Among this, you must ask participate in the DBT consult teams, acquire a letter of recommendation, and sit for the exam. These guidelines can change; but, when I last researched this, this is what I found. As extensive as it is, I respect it. It ensures the integrity of the treatment program and those practicing it.

3) Why should someone consider DBT?

Why wouldn’t you consider it? That’s the true question! Yes, it targets parasuicide and suicide behaviors. It also can address a slew of issues such as: interpersonal instability, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, anxiety of any degree, depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders, obsessive compulsive disorder. It can also assist with trauma symptoms and providing a large amount of stability skills for those dealing with PTSD. The uses for this treatment are endless. It can be used for just about any clinical problem or concern.

4) How long does it take to notice a therapeutic impact?

This is a very hard question to answer for any counseling approach. The effectiveness and improvement times are determined by client commitment. If you work in sessions and are committed to progress- in and out of appointments- then one can see progress within a few months. But, this is highly dependent on the patient.

5) What is a typical session like?

A typical session is like a traditional therapy session, the only difference is we have a whole binder of skills we weave into the sessions and teach to assist the patient in acquiring, generalizing and strengthening. DBT differs in that it requires group therapy to be effective. The Groups assist with faster skill acquisition and they function as a skill classroom. Without the groups, progress can be slower in my opinion.

6) Do you assign homework to clients?

ABSOLUTELY!!!! DBT group and individual rely heavily on homework and patient accountability. If they don’t commit, progress is stagnant.

As a therapist, we have an easy job so to speak. We teach and guide. Patients have the hard job, they have to put it into action. You cannot expect things to get better if you do nothing to change the circumstances. Homework forces the circumstances to change— and boy do they! Trust the work!

7) What are some goals a client might seek to attain while utilizing DBT?  

One we use as a blanket goal is: “Create a life worth living.”  This leaves it up to the patient to self direct. Trouble with panic attacks? Trouble with maintaining friendships? Trouble with boundaries? Self harming? Done done done! DBT has got your back! You are the driver! You tell us what your perfect life would be, and we help you create and achieve it.

In order to get through hell, you have to go through hell, and once you’re free, you are free. Trust the journey.

Hope this helps!


Please remember:Healing is possible and you are so very worthy of that gift! 

Coming next month: What is Qigong?

Defining Resilience Series: Step 6 – Find a Guiding Hand to Hold

Defining Resilience


Step 6: Find a Guiding Hand to Hold

Before diving into step 6, a reminder about resilience: it is defined as the ability to overcome adverse conditions; with healthy bonding relationships, guidance, support, and compassion as the catalysts. Basically, it entails having the capacity to bounce back from stressful or overwhelming experiences.

What are some steps we can take to ensure we are building resilience in our lives?

  1. Focus on the positives. 
  2. Seek out and nurture supportive relationships.
  3. Utilize self-care strategies. 
  4. Take action steps to create positive change.
  5. Work on healthy habit formation. 
  6. Find a guiding hand to hold.
  7. Learn to become our own hero. 
  8. Be gentle with ourselves.

Today we will cover Step 6: Find a guiding hand to hold.

I have been interviewing amazing guest after amazing guest on The Healing Place Podcast over these past few months. Insightful souls who offer coaching services, have created online courses, written books, host podcasts, offer presentations, run retreats, and so much more! All with the intent of helping others along their healing journey. I am in love with the idea of utilizing our own healing experiences to help those who are looking for guidance and a comforting hand to hold. I know when I was in despair, I was flailing in my efforts to find answers.

Finding both of my therapists (yes, I was seeing two at the same time at one point – one for talk therapy and another for EMDR therapy and trauma-processing work) was life-altering. I felt a sense of calm just knowing I had guidance as I started taking those first steps onto the healing path. However, I also started to reach out to coaches and non-traditional therapy professionals, as well. I attended a class on the Hawaiian healing technique, Ho’oponopono; had an EFT (emotional freedom technique) healing session conducted on two occasions in my home; started practicing yoga with a trained professional who had an understanding of trauma storage in the body; and other similar self-care strategies. Finding what works for YOU is the key to creating a plan and building your coping tool box.

Here are five suggestions for finding a guiding “hand to hold”:

  • Listen to podcasts or watch YouTube videos related to your needs: I am a researcher by nature. My favorite question as a child, according to my parents, was, “Why?” Understanding your habits, fears, concerns, solutions, and just having a feeling of connection through the power of “Oh my gosh, me, too!”, can empower your healing quest. The trick is to search for key words (try typing the following in a Google search ACEsEFT tapping, or Yoga YouTube . . . I personally LOVE Yoga with Adrienne!)  *Hint* My podcast has over 50 episodes filled with motivation, inspiration, and healing light and can be listened to at your convenience simply by visiting my website and scrolling to the bottom of the podcast page. If you have Bluetooth capabilities in your car, hit play and listen in while you drive!
  • Find an online course, webinar or summit: Some are free, some are free for a limited time and then available to purchase an access pass, some are fee-based and costs vary from minimal to what some may consider to be expensive. I know I recently watched a webinar and the presenter then offered me a package deal at the end for only two payments of $4,998.00. After I finished choking on my coffee, I exited out of the program a little wiser on my need to research before devoting an hour of my precious time. Make sure to review ratings and create a bookmark folder for yourself. I have folders labeled, “research”, “blogs”, “podcasts”, and so on. Some are geared toward professionals and others toward those seeking assistance. For example, an “addictions webinar” search will bring up both professional and personal webinar options.
  • Hire a therapist: This one can be tricky only because there are factors to consider such as insurance coverage, type of therapy, available providers in your area, and so on. Do not let it inhibit you, however. I promise you, the effort you put in to finding the right therapist will be worth it. I had searched for an EMDR therapist when my counselor first suggested I consider EMDR as a trauma-processing option and found someone close to home (I was experiencing pretty severe driving anxiety at that time). I did no further research before scheduling the appointment. And, wow, was THAT a lesson learned. He told me I was “cured” after three sessions and then advised me that the reason I had highway phobias was because “cars are big and scary”. Oh boy. Yes, I reported him. Yes, I stopped seeing him immediately. Then I searched again, researched the woman I found who most appealed to my needs, and promised myself I could drive the forty minutes to her office as I was so very worthy of the effort. Ninety-eight sessions and four years later, I was a new woman. It was truly a life-altering process and I am forever grateful to Dr. Barb Hensley of Cincinnati Trauma Connection. Find someone who specializes in your needs (if having someone who is LGBTQ sensitive is important, then specify that in your search, and/or perhaps you would feel more comfortable with a specific gender, or you would like to consider a therapy with minimal talking such as an art therapy modality). Again. . . do YOU and what works for your needs.
  • Secure a life-coach: This can also seem a daunting task. There are coaches for weight loss, general motivation (think Tony Robbins), relationship coaches, stress and mental health, career coaching, online coaching, Facebook coaching groups, coaches you can call or video-chat with weekly, and on and on. Many of my podcast guests offer coaching services. The key, again, is finding what works for you. Assess your needs and then research. Are you looking for someone who specializes in toxic relationships? Or maybe co-dependency? Perhaps you really want a guiding hand when it comes to emotional eating. Do you need time-management help? A goal of mine is to create a coaching plan for healing through the power of forgiveness. I look forward to creating a course and/or coaching plan in 2019!
  • Utilize the power of friendship and soul connections: I treasure those go-to peeps in my life that I can call at any time to cry, laugh, wallow, or celebrate. Whether it’s my sister or a close friend, my mom or my son who lives five states away, there is solace in connecting. As I discussed in my August, 2018 Hope for Healing Newsletter, make an effort to connect with others with similar interests and you will start to grow your support network. As I’ve stressed previously, however, be sure to reach for those who lift you up with positivity, avoiding (if not eliminating) those toxic relationships and the energy-vampires who will hinder your healing progress.
Coming up next month: Step 7: Learn to become your own hero.

The Healing Place Podcast Episode 47: Sarah Guilfoy – Heart to Heart

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I’m your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/
I thoroughly enjoyed my connection and laughter shared with my guest Sarah Guilfoy – founder and managing director of the non-profit, Heart to Heart. Sarah’s background includes teaching, a degree in Psychology, and a personal ACEs score of 8/9 (so very similar to my own background!). Please join us as we discuss Sarah’s beautiful passion of providing a parent support line via phone, text, and email as a way of offering free emotional support for caregivers. Heart to Heart is partnered with Healthy Beginnings in the state of Oregon.

As shared from the Heart to Heart website:

“Heart to Heart is a free telephone, text, and email service for parents and others experiencing family life or parenting challenges.

This nonjudgmental service provides a listening ear, support and guidance to parents and caregivers who are upset or troubled about a family issue, or just need someone to talk to. Heart to Heart is staffed by parent volunteers. As parents, they truly understand that parenting is hard work! They are available to help ease some of that workload, by offering support.

LEARN MORE AT 541-322-2019″

Thanks for tuning in!

You can also watch our interview on YouTube. So exciting!

Broken Trophies & Nature Hearts

I want to share a story of hope. And love. And forgiveness. But, before I share the happy part, I want to tell you about my dad and our history. For those needing it, *trigger warning for physical abuse*.

My dad hit me, quite violently at times, using a belt most days (the jingle of a belt buckle used to make those little hairs on my neck take notice). I was the oldest of two girls and, fortunate for me, but not my younger sister, I could scurry behind a locked bathroom door before being caught. I would spend my moments of terror, counting dingy white tiles in our tiny apartment bathroom, trying to tune out the sounds coming from outside my temporary safe space.

However, sometimes I was caught. Dad was six foot six, two-hundred and eighty pounds, and angry. At life. At his circumstances. At his alcoholic wife screaming for him to silence the children. At financial woes. At his boss. Whatever it was, he was angry about it. And we were easy prey, my little sister and me.

Sometimes he would throw something. Once he beheaded a statue of Jesus. My sister glued it back on. Another time, he broke my soccer trophy in half. I taped it back together with masking tape. The soccer player looked like she was playing with a cast on. Symbolic really. Keep on striving, even when broken.

When I was ten years old, my dad called me into his bedroom (my parents slept in separate rooms). He sat me on his lap and told me the following: “Teri, I’ve been seeing a doctor. A counselor. And I now realize I never should have hit you. I’m sorry. I promise to never hit you again. From now on you get to decide your discipline.” There was more, but that’s all I can remember.

And he never hit me again. My first lesson in forgiveness. And what a beautifully powerful one it was.

You see, my dad was also my saving grace. He was the one who took us to Burger Chef for a Fun Meal after our soccer games on Saturday mornings. Mom was at work and rarely came to our games. Dad tucked us in with stories of dragons and spaceships and talking dogs. He was the one who taught me how to count with raisins. And sat me on his lap when he would draw. He ran alongside my purple bike with the flowered banana seat as I wobbled around the school playground until he felt safe enough to let go, cheering me on with an exuberant, “You’re doing it!”

He was a good dad. Who was hurt as a child and didn’t know the impact of his violent actions on his own children until someone came along to show him the error of his ways. I thank God he had the compassion to listen. And apologize.

My dad died in January, 2009, of complications resulting from his diabetes.

This morning I went for my morning hike and said, “Dad, you should join me” (he loved his ‘exercise walks’ as he called them). I truly believe his spirit tagged along.

I was walking along a path strewn with hundreds of leaves when I sensed an excited energy urging me to “look down!” Sure enough. There in that mix of decaying brown, yellow, red, and orange tints was a tiny heart.

This continued throughout my hike. I would smile and send out an “I see it! Thanks!”

As I was headed to my car, the last of the sun on a blue-sky morning, now turning grey, was peering through a yellow-leafed tree. I felt a “Look up!” energy. I did and couldn’t help but laugh. There it was 💛

#thanksDad

The Healing Place Podcast Episode 44: Cortney Edmondson

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I’m your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/
I thoroughly enjoyed this enlightening interview with Cortney Edmondson – advocate, speaker, survivor, activist. Please join us as we discuss Cortney’s healing journey from trauma to triumph, her mission to provide others with a space to share their stories, her speaking joys, and much more!
Cortney shared the following information (and totally made my day with the compliment!):
Thank you so much for the opportunity to share tonight.  You are an incredible host! Below are the links to my instagram profiles and my website.
 
Instagram: @cortney_edmondson    &    @embracing_ACEs

Please be sure to follow, visit, and reach out.

Peace to you all!
Teri

 

 

 

The Healing Place Podcast Episode 41: Emily Daniels – Here This Now

Welcome to The Healing Place Podcast! I’m your host, Teri Wellbrock. You can listen in on iTunes, Blubrry or directly on my website at www.teriwellbrock.com/podcasts/
I loved this interview with Emily Read Daniels, founder of HereThisNow! Please join us as we discuss trauma-informed trainings, workshops, speaking, blogging, and so much more. Be sure to check out their course offerings and upcoming retreats.
Emily kindly shared the following information for us.
Thank you, again, for the interview this morning! It was an honor and a pleasure and I do hope we have reason to connect again.
Please find the links you mentioned:
* Website:  www.herethisnow.org
* Upcoming October 21-24th Retreat:  The Trauma Informed School 2.0 with Lara Kain
Peace to you all!
Teri